Judgement.

I'm a bitch.

I'm not going to lie about it, its a true fact. I enjoy sitting around, with my friends, talking about people and judging them behind their backs. 

But let's be honest, some people do just deserve it, and others don't do themselves any favours. I'm talking about the 'elite group' at school (for reference, when I say school, I mean college/sixth form. Same difference to me). 

There's four seating areas in my common room, consisting of these groups:

• Mine - we're the quiet, friendly but mildly rejected group.
• 'Elites', or populars - Think Mean Girls times 20, but not quite that mean.
• The 'I'm so hot I get all the boys and sex jokes are super cool' types.
• The unnecessarily loud, obnoxious and messy ones.

And with this much division, how can we not all bitch about the other groups? Particularly great is the fact that the latter two groups seem to consider themselves popular, when in reality, almost everyone and their mother dislikes them for something. Of course their oblivious to it. The oblivious ones are the best.

You may have sussed by now that I go to an all girls' school.

But with all of this judgyness towards the rest of the population, where does that leave me? Because if I'm judging the planet for their faults and amazing fashion 'sense' and mannerisms, are they not doing the same to me?

I honestly don't know, you tell me. Does everyone talk about everyone behind their backs, or is it just me, my friends and the girls in American teen drama? 

Point is, me being as judgemental as I am has left me with a serious knock in confidence. Its improving, but I'm somewhat introverted, and don't like to express myself too much for fear that people will see me as one of those loud, obnoxious types. I don't dress the way I want to because, where I live, it just doesn't work to look somewhat classy when everyone else is wearing shorts, crop tops and skirts that barely conceal their derrière. 

I am fully aware this may make no sense, if I'm judging people, surely its because I'm self confident. Well, yes, to some extent, I have my principles and opinions and I'm not one to follow to crowd, but I think its the intense fear of doing just that; following the crowd, which prevents me from being truly confident in myself and my actions. 

Maybe I need to start being a more accepting person. But then, what is there to talk about?